Cheesecake & The Pick Up Artist Part Seven

As the night progressed, I found myself wandering the party in a daze. My New Years Eve had not gone at all how I expected. I had dreams of a sexual adventure that I would be telling my friends about for years. Instead, it was a night filled with shame and embarrassment.

I walked up to the roof of the apartment hoping to change my fate. The party was in full swing as I arrived. Beautiful people were drinking, dancing and generally having a grand time. I found Jack upstairs talking to a group of girls. All three were stunning and I could tell that Jack was in over his head. He was sweating and his expression was full of anxiety.

As I approached them I suddenly got the idea to use my latest magic trick. The fire wallet was a trick wallet that when opened would shoot flames in the air. It was a trick I had been practicing for weeks with. I was looking forward to performing it and figured that it would make quite an impression on these girls.


Jack looked at me with relief as I approached. “David!” he yelled. “Come meet my new friends!”
Jack put his arm around my neck and playfully pulled me down. “This is my buddy Dave,” He said with relief. “Dave these are my new friends Cheryl, Betty and Sandy,” He said pointing at each one.

“Hey,” I said shaking each of their hands. “So what’s going on?” I asked.

“Not much we were just saying how much this party sucks,” Sandy said as she brushed her blond hair out of her gorgeous green eyes.

This was the perfect moment for a magic trick I thought. So I took out my fire wallet and brought it up to my face.

“Well, maybe we ought to liven things up,” I said as I ignited it.

Flames popped out and I could see girls total shock at what was happening. It was my moment of accomplishment. I knew I had just made an impression that would be all they talked about.
And just then…In one utter disastrous moment. A gust of wind came and blew the flames directly onto my face setting my beard a flame.

The girls began to scream. Jack in a bit of a panic threw his drink on me soaking me and the wallet. The women’s screams now became uncontrollable laughter. The smell of burnt hair began to hit my nostrils. I stormed off to the bathroom to dry off and looked at myself in the mirror. The damage was thankfully minor. I had lost part of my beard and a small portion of one of my eyebrows was now gone.

I don’t know about you, dear reader, but when you burn off part of your face. That to me was a wake up call. I soon left the party and while I made the trek home I thought about my existence. This system had wrecked my life and I was no closer to my goals.

When I got home I shot Frankie D an e-mail telling him all of this and I got a response back fairly quickly.

Dear David,

It's pretty clear to me that you are just not trying hard enough. I can only imagine that your anger at the system is not a failure of it. Its just that you have fallen back into bad habits and are mad that our boot camp was not a magic pill. I can only open the door for you, it's up to you to walk through it.

Frankie D


To say I was pissed was an understatement. The truth is a hard pill to swallow. Frankie D of course was wrong. But how could I speak to someone about waking up from denial, when they were still in the throws of it themselves.

It took another few months of hard work, but I finally did get my life back in order. I think back at this part of my life with some embarrassment and regret. But I also feel it was a necessary evil to get me at the point I am in my life right now.

A few years ago I went on a date where the woman at the end looked at me and said “You know David, you’re just a pure nice guy”

This haunted me for months and was one of the incidents that got me to contact Frankie D in the first place. Now that I think about it, I would rather be a pure nice guy than a pick up artist any day.

The End